Anak: Ma, hingi sana ako ng P50.
Son: Ma, can I have $50?
Nanay: P40? Ang laki naman ng P30! Anong gagawin mo sa P20? Akala mo madaling kumita ng P10? O, eto P5.
Mother: $40? $30 is too big! What you will do with $20? You think it is easy to earn $10? Ok, here's $5.
1st night lola (grandma) wore see thru dress, lolo (grandpa)didn't react...
2nd night lola (grandma) wore t-back, lolo (grandpa) still deadma...
3rd night lola (Grandma) all naked, lolo (grandpa) said "anu yan suot mo, gusot-gusot!!" (what's that you are wearing? It's wrinkled!)
Juan: bday ng asawa ko. (John: It's my wife's birthday.)
Pedro: ano regalo mo? (Peter: What's your gift?)
Juan: tinanong ko kung ano gusto niya. (John: I asked her what she wants)
P: ano naman sinabi? (Peter: What she said?)
J: Kahit ano basta may DIAMOND. (John: Anything but with DIAMOND.)
P: ano binigay mo? (Peter: What did you give her?)
J: Baraha. (John: A deck of card.)
Wife: Lab, may taning na ang buhay ko. Huling gabi ko na to, let's make love.
Wife: Love, my life is ending. It's my last night, let's make love.
Husband: Heh! tumigil ka nga. Maaga pa akong gigising bukas, buti ikaw hindi na!
Husband: Shh! Stop it. I have to wake up early. Lucky you, you won't!